this time it's going to be different .

i dont even know where to begin .

things have been up , down , & all around .

 yet im sooo happy . i find my self smiling more & more everyday .

& i now this sounds corney as fuck , but i feel so intune with my soul .

ive been reading , writing , researching , & exploring new everything .

but dont get shit twisted . im still me . & i still like my shit BLACK .

but . . . i think its time i switched the style up . again . lol

& i know ive said i'd open up more about my personal life & havent really .

sooo this time around shit is about to get personal . reaaal fucking personal .

sooo lets get caught up shall we ?

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song of the day :

Leave by VV Brown

i feel like if i was to make a up beat song . i would have done exactly this . she's a new artist on the rise . pleaseee check out more of her music .

" now you're alone in the dark with a bruised broken heart . "

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soooo lately ive been working . alot . in fact too much . i feel like im always there .

but once im there i dont think about anything else but the money . i just feel like i can i freee my mind there .

its funny because i used to just sit at home & not do shit . & now im constantly running back & forth . i love it though . & not to mention the fucking weather . like where the fuckkkk did spring go ? but i cant complain . going outside just puts a smile on my face . go take a walk or read a book or a magzine outside . im telling you'll love it . other than work , ive been doing the usual . the three S's :

shopping , swearing , & smoking .

haha ! & thats what i'll be doing all summer long . i also going back to school next month . im only taking fitness & wellnes because i want to spend most of my summer working & taking trips with me friends . this summer is going to be sooo epic . every summer has a story & im not looking for a fairytale . im looking for a new york times best seller .

* but thats enough about me . TRUST ME , ill tell you guys a lot more within these up coming post .

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. SPOTTED .

Katy Perry & Rihanna on the red carpet at Kids Choice Awards .

-Katy looks amazing , & that big wig she wore was sooo her , i loved it . Rihanna on the other looks like a grandma . likei know its the KCA but we allll know you would never where that anywhere else . & her performance was soo suckish . why the hell would she pick rudeboy of all songs ? i know all the little kids were like " moooommmmyyy . whats a rudeeeboyyy ?!? "

Demi Lovato & Joe Jonas . how motherfucking cutee ! when i found out they were dating i almost died . i love demi & i love joe & them together is HOT SEX . which i know they're having . i meaan wtf . all the do is PDA . they were spotted shopping & spending the day chillin in the park . i think they make a great couple . i hope they last .

Pharrell Williams looking sexyyy , his birthday just recently passed on april 5th . he turned 37 . fucking wow right ?! i know . i had no idea he was soo old . he looks good though . for a old coot . loving his outfit though . those are chanel glasses by the way . he's got style for daysss .

Beyonce & Jay Z in the white house . what they're doing there i have noooo fucking clue . & i wonder what they're talking about . probably some illuminati shit . & why the fuck is Jay Z at the head of the table like he's the president ?! hmmm . i gotta do some research on this , i really want to know what they're doing there . updates sooooon .

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. TRAVELING CIRCUS .

look at my lovely momma monsterr . this picture was banned in the U.S by the way .

she's also going on tour , ill have the official tour dates up soon . talk of the town is that ticktets are selling for 178 & up . sheeeeeeessssshhh ! i really want to see her though . who knows .

RiRi on american idol . looking amazing always . & i guess this time she wasn't missing a black guitar .

she is also going to be going on tour . its called " The Last Girl On Earth " & joining her will be Ke$ha & Nicki Minaj . wierd combo but i can dig it . ill have her official tour dates soon as well . & since we're on the subject of RiRi here's what she had to say about "close" friend Matt Kemp :

“He’s my boyfriend. … It’s new and it’s fun and it’s nothing too serious. I don’t want anything nuts that’s gonna take up so much of my energy and time in a bad way.”

o_0
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you cocked your head to the side & smiled didnt you ?

justtttt checking . . .

:]

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Nick Jonas for VMan magazine .

three different SEXY covers .

need i say more ?

selena & him broke up by the way . oh well , shit happens .

i dont really like selena anyway . sooo uhm . moving on ?

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Ali Lohan . dont know who's she's posing for . but heyyy , lohan's spazzing out so someones gotta bring the bread home .

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how long has it been since you've been inspired ?
here's a double dose . can you handle it ? 

. GET INSPIRED .

if i cant keep you then i give up .

how can i listen to my mind without breaking my heart ?

bottled up inside are the words i never said & the feelings that were never read .

i dont like what i becoming .

love is the ultimate performance .

do you want to sit here & die ? tell me , cause i will sit here & die with you .

my word is my pride .

you're soo beautiful that it would torment an angel to insanity .

baby i aint addicted . im committed .

your deception & lies will cost you dearly .

he's too in love with himself to be in love with anyone else .

i want to see your sould through the holes in your face .

is there still a world outside my windowsill ?

i dont care if you call me crazy , ive been called worse .

we're a pair . a perfect match . we're just ment to be .

you're too comfortable in your memories .

all my life ive been a fool .

we must do extraordinary things . we have to . it would be absurd not to .

you gave strength when i couldnt give it to myself .

you cant kill a man with soul .

big boys dont cry but they sure do fall .

bitch you a hoe . thats why i dont call you no more .

you left me with no love . & no love to my name .

he's something like a rolling stone .

i swear if they turned the lights down in this place you'd shine like star .

lovely ran through her veins & she always wondered why .

i feel like im on my knees . & you're just laughing at me .

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. PHOTOGRAPHY .

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we never trust that feeling we have when something bad is about to happen . & then when it does happen we act sooo surprised . why ? we knew it was coming . & yet we continue to ignore the things that are only there to help us . so the next time he tells you , " baby , this time it's going to be different . " listen to that feeling . & if that feeling tells you he's going to leave your heart in a puddle on the floor . take two steps back . so you can get a good look at the mother fucker . & let your soul do the talking . it might be hard . but its the right thing to do . sometimes the hardest thing & the right thing are equally the same .

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kept this short because im working on sooo many different things . ive got to get myself caught up .
& thanks for reading guys ! i love all of you :]

you are not an island .

i want to write a short story , but i have no idea what i want to be about . & since its going to be my first story i want it to be something im proud of . soo i've been watching a lot of movies to get inspiration & shitt . ive got alot of good material & quotes that i can use but im still looking for that something . so i set out to go to Borders . you know . the bookstore . but not without going to the thift store first . where i live its called The Village . how chic . & its funny cause the first time i went there . omg it was a nightmare . i couldnt find SHIT MANNNN ! but its my favorite place to go now . i got some cute sweaters , shoes , & belts . next time i go i'll take pictures of what i got for you guys to get inspired to go . it truely is a place to get one of a kind pieces . im sooo over the mall [ except for H&M ) . its like a whole bunch of wanna be robots walking around . fuck it . i couldnt do it anymore .

the man at Borders asked me if he could help me with anything & i was kinda hesitant to ask . . . i didnt want him to look at me weird . but i was glad i did . i told him i need some inspiration for a short story . something with dark humor but also aspiring . he gave this book with a little girl & her grandma on the front cover reading a magazine about guns . he said it had a bunch of short stories that are pretty fucked . but in a good way . i took the book & studied the front cover . they were happily smiling like they were reading the three little pigs or some shit . i looked at the man . & said " perfect " . i dont remember what the book was called though . marijana does horrible things to my memory . l0l ! & on the way to where the reading area was i picked up Rolling Stone with John Mayer on the front . god i love that man . . . i took a seat next the window & began to flip through the pages . i was really into a story about a boy who thought there was a panther in his house when my sidekick began to rang . let me remind you i was in the READING AREA . the only sounds you hear are the typing from people on their laptops . the turning of pages . & the espresso machine . & all of that was interupted by

" SHE BAD AS HELL LETS CALL HER HELEN "

ugh . embarrising doesnt even describe the moment . i hurried up & ended the call . i didnt even know who it was from . some unknown shit . i looked around and said " sorry sorry sorry " . this old man who was reading a newspaper grunted at me . i felt so bad . i mouthed sorry to him & he just looked back down at what he was reading . i know they were all thinking " this must be her first time here . stupid bitch doesnt even know how to put her phone on silent " . i know its not a big deal but , i feel like i disrespected them in a way . but whatever . they're just gonna have to get used to me . i like it there . & i will continue to go . & i will continue to forget to put my phone on silent .

song of the day : Breakeven - The Script .

fucking LOVE this band . this is def. a song that everyone can relate too . & yess you'll probably be replaying this one too .

" when a heart breaks , no it dont break even . "

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SPOTTED .

Ke$ha & Justin Bieber at the Pre Grammy Show .

im beginning to think that dollar sign is permanetly tatted on her arm .

& Justin looks like he smelt the Jack Daniels on her breath .

Benji & Joel Madden & Kid Cudi at the " we are the world " recording .

& here's the cudder with Jamie Foxx & Knaye West .

wow . they let him show his face at this event huh ? l0l

Miley Cyrus , her boyfriend Liam Hemsworth , and Demi Lovato were spotted having dinner out in Studio City .

Queen Gaga & Queen B on the set of " Telephone "

cant wait for thisss .

this is going to be sooo much better than video phone .

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Agyness Deyn and Orlando Bloom play Hollywood power couple in the Terry Richardson-shot spring 2010 campaign for Chinese label , Me & City . The duo " shop , " " cook , " and have passive aggressive looking " lunches " in a slew of shots that display the astounding dearth of chemistry between the two . i found it kind of wierd that Bloom didnt have the shoot with his real life girlfriend Miranda Kerr . hmmmm . well we'll never know . they do seem a bit akward in the photos though . gahhh i LOVE Agyness . her style is soo wierd its amazing . 

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ohhhhh just becauseeee . . .

;]

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forreal ?

YSL ciggys . soooo chic it hurts .

hello kitty chain saw .

its too pretty to use .

is this fucking cool or what ?

i dont know who it's by but DAMN !

you know anything in a shape of a weapon is appealing to me .

 Louis Vuitton Garbage Bags . litterally .

i wouldnt wear it .

but its pretty cool .

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In Rihanna's World .

a couple of stills from the Pepsi Smash :

 

whew lord <3

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get inspired :

i love your perfume . it reminds me of death

the glitter in your eyes dances so beautifully .

what i want this much . shouldnt hurt this bad .

life is so fucking boring without temptation .

dear gravity , you held me down in this starless city .

build confidence out of bricks & steel .

if it dont come in a shot glass then i dont want it ,

lord , please save me from the nothing ive become .

a coincidence is fate misnamed .

clumsy ass bitches slip & fall into a death trap .

a honest man has nothing to fear .

pain is only to remind us that we are still alive .

muscles dont make the man .

lets run the streets & scream mayhem from the top of our lungs .

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stop the looking .

stop the searching .

you are not christopher columbus .

nor is self - discover apart of your to - do list .

there is simply nothing to discover .

you are not an island .

you are soul .

a soul that has found a body .

which has found a life .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOB MARLEY <3